Zen Thoughts - Lighter Side

Articles The Lighter Side
1

What is life if there is not laughter?
Welcome to the lighter side of flyfishing! We welcome your stories here!
November 22nd, 2004

Zen Thoughts Sent in by David Griego

  1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
    Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
    Do not walk beside me either. Just leave me the
    hell alone.

  2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with
    a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

  3. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if your’re
    going to steal your neighbors newspaper, that’s
    the time to do it.

  4. Sex is like air. It’s not important unless
    you aren’t getting any.

  5. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be
    replaced, you can’t be promoted.

  6. No one is listening until you pass gas.

  7. Always remember you’re unique. Just like
    everyone else.

8.Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

  1. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive,
    try missing a couple of car payments.

  2. Before you criticize someone, you should
    walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you
    criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have
    their shoes.

  3. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is
    not for you.

  4. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.
    Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat
    and drink beer all day.

  5. If you lend someone $20 and never see that
    person again, it was probably worth it.

  6. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to
    remember anything.

  7. Some days you are the bug; some days you
    are the windshield.

  8. Don’t worry; it only seems kinky the first
    time.

  9. Good judgement comes from bad experience,
    and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.

  10. The quickest way to double your money is to
    fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

  11. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

  12. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light
    side and a dark side, and it holds the universe
    together.

  13. There are two theories to arguing with women.
    Neither one works.

  14. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much
    when your lips are moving.

  15. Experience is something you don’t get until
    just after you need it.

  16. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

  17. We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and
    get slapped on our ass…then things get worse.

  18. Some people are like Slinkies…not really
    good for anything, but you still can’t help but
    smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

  19. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

  20. All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
    It pays no attention to criticism.

  21. There are two kinds of pedestrians: the
    quick and the dead.

  22. If quitters never win, and winners never
    quit, then who is the fool who said, “Quit
    while you’re ahead?”

Originally published November 22nd, 2004 on Fly Anglers Online by David Griego.