Just when I thought the nut case across the street could not get any nuttier, he decides to change the front door of his house, and begins removing the old door with a Sawzall…AT 5:45 A.M. What kind of a whack job would wake up the entire neighborhood at that hour by starting a construction project? My normally sweet bride (opposites attract) kicked me and asked; “What the hell is going on over there?” to which I replied; “He’s probably using the Sawzall to chop up body parts of the screaming Mimi he lives with…just go back to sleep.”
She wasn’t having any of that noise, so she handed the phone to me and said to call the cops, since there’s a noise ordinance in our city. Of course, it took twenty minutes for the fuzz to show up, and the next thing you saw was a green plastic tarp covering the opening and the fuzz pulling away. No shots were fired, but there was an exchange of words which I couldn’t understand from 300 feet away. Probably some threat towards whoever would dare to call the cops on him for such a minor infraction.
Ahhhhh…peace and quite returns…until the dog starts whining to go out to do her business. Kicked again;“Go let your dog out before she makes a mess on my floor.” To which I respond with the two words that have made our marriage successful for 35 years; “Yes, dear.”
Joseph the Tired
P.S. I’m visiting my doctor today to try and determine why I have so many black & blue marks on my legs. Hopefully he’ll have some answers for me. My wife says they’re nothing to be concerned about. Hmmmmm…
To Joseph the Tired, Rod Builder in Chains, All 'Round Great Guy, etc, etc…
I wish you peace and ease for the rest of the weekend. I wish that you encounter fish that rise only to your fly and trees whose nasty, little, fly-grabbing limbs are blown away from your flies by timely winds. I wish that your landing net is too small but the fish adequately patient. I wish that your dries float and your wets sink. I wish that your next lottery ticket have all the right numbers in all the right places. [I’m praying for that one for you, buddy ]
I wish that the nut case across the street suffers a catastrophic plumbing failure that inspires visions of the Old Testament Fear in all who see/hear it. I wish that the electric motors of all of his power tools seize. I wish that he develops good taste in music. I wish that his next serving of ice cream comes from cows who partook heavily of wild onions.
I hope that you remember that you have many friends on this site who also wish you well.
I think all neighborhoods (and mine is no exception) have at least one nimrod that is off the hook. Two suggestions to cure the black and blue nasties: One option is to sleep with some goalie pads on. Not very comfortable but will come in handy when absorbing a round house kick to the shins. The other is to hit the water early in the morning on the weekends. The latter being the most logical choice. Good luck my friend and may the spirit of patience smile down on you.
Joe,
Is RDL the ACTUAL neighbor your complaining about??? :shock: RDL, I want to apologize on behalf of all of us here Members! Don’t let the actions of one (Joseph the Tired) to make you give up and leave the BB. I will continue to ‘WORK’ with Joseph until he gets straightened out.
RDL, I am also VERY sorry you have such a BIG Honey Do List!
Doug
Joe,
Is RDL the ACTUAL neighbor your complaining about??? :shock: [/quote]
Yep, this is the guy. “Hey, where’s your whack job next door neighbor who i saw carrying the shop vac to your house at 0615?” There were actually two perps in this incident. Dumb & Dumber. Ironically, both of their first names are the same. These must be the original evil twins.
RDL;
Don’t mind these two! They are good friends of mine (did I really say that!?) and though somewhat twisted they mean well!
I plan to vist joe and fire up a chainsaw around 0430 in the am. then beat feet back to Tennessee, laughing all the way!!
Doug and Joe a very fine, hard working members of thier respective communities. At least that is what their case workers tell me
Joe might I suggest the grand ole hobby of drinking !!! Drink enough and nothing will wake you up til at least 11 am. :lol:
I have a neighbor who seem to enjoy his drag cars at 8 am Saturday morning . He lives 3 doors down and the vibrate my house. Lucky for me I wake up very early most days …not so lucky for the other neighbor who works nights.
Gringo,
It’s taken me a while to formulate a reply to your “I’m jealous, I don’t have neighbors.”
My Personal Encounters.
Neighbors having LOUD party in my building at 2 am. My response? Charging down the hallway and POUNDING on their door! and screaming “GET OUT HERE!, RIGHT NOW!!!” I heard someone behind the door say, “Don’t OPEN the DOOR!!” Well that motivated me even more and I yelled, "I WANT THE RENTERS OUT HERE, N O W !!! They finally opened the door and (I was calm) I proceeded to tell the Idiot that we ARE NOT going to have parties ANYMORE!!! The NEXT thing that happened took me by SURPRISE!
About twenty party goers started filing out of the party!! :lol: All of a sudden I started smiling and as each person went past me down the stairs, I said stuff like, “Thanks for coming!” I told one guy “Merry Christmas!” I don’t know why? One guy waited until he was at the bottom of the stairway and quizzed me ,saying “What’s Your Name?” I said “DOUG and if you want to know my Last name come back up here!”
I don’t make a habit of taking things in my own hands, but they were just young kids, in their FIRST Apt. and I had a BLAST scaring the Hell out of them!!! :lol: The next weekend I called the Sheriff twice, Friday & Saturday because of their noise and shortly after, they were EVICTED!!! I gave those to Idiots a nickname and that was MINI-GANGSTERS.
Later my Mother told me she was PROUD of me!, Since good Old Mom pulled a few stunts in her earlier yrs that were pretty funny and eye opening!
I am NOT making this next story UP!! I promise! One day I was getting ready to go do my Volunteer work and Jerry Springer show was on my TV. I thought I heard a noise and I looked out the window and Lo & Behold! Two of my neighbors, (Man & Woman) were having a FIST FIGHT! In the PARKING LOT!!!
Before you think the Woman was being abused, the MAN was being abused! She was punching and punching him!! That Woman was the most DANGEROUS person who has ever lived here and Thank God she was evicted.
After 10 years of living with virtualy no neighbors in the North Woods of Michigan I was a little apprehensive of having neighbors again.
Well it has turned out to be a very quiet neighborhood. The only noise is from the lawn mowers and they don’t start until 9 am. or late in the afternoon when it cools down. All the home are set back at least 50’ from the road and at least 50’ apart.
My back yard borders a small horse farm so I have a nice view from the back porch.
I do remember apartment living and learned to find out the ages of the surrounding tennents and stay as far away from the pool as possible!
I only have a handful of neighbors
About this time of year a couple of them begin to get geared up for hunting season, so there’s some rifle sighting and other shooting going on.
The guy in the woods about a 1/4 mile to the west has semi-automatic weapons :shock:
Some one may call the cops on him someday, but it ain’t gonna be me
Doug, I enjoyed your stories, thanks for sharing. I am pleased you weren’t shot to death too.
I actually have some fond memories of neighbors: kids of like ages being brought up close together and always having company over the fence; shared food with some interesting people during my younger/poorer days; and some delightful and considerate people when I was in Melbourne. No real horror stories from me that I can recall. There are plenty of times though that peoples inconsideration can ruin a good sleep or make night shift unbearable - I’m glad I’m on my own out here with only rabbits and foxes to shoot at.
You could have neighbors like mine (insert sarcasm here) !! Now never said my kids were angels, not in the least, I am their mother after all…well the boy, who is almost 7… well he decided while over playing with his little "girl"friend, the he would take the cord for their halloween decorations…and pocket it…He is a treasure hunter for sure…and if its on the floor, wether I just dropped it a second a go…if he seen it, it goes in his pocket, for treasure. Well playing with the lovely neighbors, he picks up the cord, which he claims the DAUGHTER took off the Halloween ghost in the first place…and pocketed it…She (the mom) came over and knocked and asked about it and my oldest boy mentioned having seen his brother take it. So I send him out to look for and retrieve and return the cord…no problem. Next thing I know the 6 year old almost 7…comes high tailing it in the house, crying hysterically…She called the police. Had her cord back, but still called the cops. Now hes on house arrest.
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