I know none of you know me, i don’t wanna sound like a whiner. but, i figure i gotta vent somewhere…
my girl friend left me. She found herself another guy. i know, i’ll get over it, but its so hard. i loved her, with all of my being. she even admitted to me that i didn’t do anything wrong… i didn’t either. i got her flowers, cards, usually out of the blue. i guess i just wasn’t good enough, she got tired of me. its make me wanna just give up.
anyways, what i guess i’m trying to say is this; Guys(ladies too), what would you do? you know, to keep your mind off the hurt and all that. its been about 2 weeks now. i have trouble falling asleep. i feel lonely. i don’t have any friends i could go out with, all i had was her. i’d like more than anything to meet a nice girl, with a good true heart. but, i’m real shy, and i have a little stutter. i lack confidence, but i’m 6’3" and i guess not too bad. i want more self confidence
What would you guys do? i know none of you know me, but i’d appreciate any and all opinions.
Florida Fly;
First Welcome to the best site on the net!!
Next, Women are like a load of stone! You can always get another load!!
Seriously, It’s your life live it to the fullest. This was just part of the tempering process. Believe me, you’ll probably be better for it!
I feel more like I do now than I did when I got here!
Your profile says you are a student…find someone at school who you think is nice and ask for her help. Not with your love life, something school related. Start up a conversation, make some new lady friends…note, I did not say girlfriends, that will come in time. Get “out there” and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Everyone has gone through it, you will survive it too.
Welcome to FAOL - we do care.
And then there’s the “gettin even” thing. Throw yourself in the direction of self improvement and show her what a mistake she made by dumping you. This remedy usually takes some time BUT in the end YOU WIN. Who knows, you may someday thank her for her decision and the motivation it inspired. DO IT!!
It seems like I was just helping a friend of mine with this… Well, I will tell you what I told him - It’s not the end of the world, even if it seems that way. Also, look at the brighter side - you escaped from a girl that is probably not a “keeper”. She was just a gf, imagine what it would be like if you had been more committed? You dodged a bullet.
And I would second what LF said. Even if you dont have any male friends to turn to, a girl has those mothering instincts and would be more than happy to help you out. They are really good at making you feel better.
FF,
Welcome to the board!
All these “dark clouds” have a silver lining. You will be stronger from the experience, and you will be better off. Chris gave great advice, especially about the rebound thing. Get involved with the community…maybe Big Brothers, or at this time of year, volunteer for a toy drive or something else to help others less fortunate…IMHO, it is GREAT therapy!..You’ll be fine.
Mike
Hi there young man. A neat trick when a person feels lousy is to volunteer, to be in service to others. You could do this any number of places. Volunteering helps me to be out-focused and sometimes that is exactly what I need. Best wishes to you.
Florida, The most successful people I know can “divide” their lives. I know they may be hurting in one respect; but they are cheerfully carrying on each day.
If you’re a student, you’re looking at final week. Pour yourself into your classes. Get ready for those tests!
No matter what happens with this relationship. You must deal with your finals for YOUR OWN sake.
By the way, when the tests are over, I’d find some time to go fishing. Ya might find some sexy, bright, interesting gal with a fly rod in her hand.
Swing hard, in case they throw the ball where you’re swinging. Duke Snider
A few disjointed thoughts related to your predicament:
Been there - done that. Sorry. It sucks. Just bear in mind that everyone else has been there too. It will pass.
A wise man once said, “When the going gets tough, the tough go fishing.”
Staying on the fishing theme, another wise man once said, “There are plenty of other fish in the sea.” No sense giving up, but you’d be surprised how many people say that they found their soulmate shortly after they completely gave up on finding them. I think the point is to LET it happen instead of trying to MAKE it happen.
You’re a young man in FL. Go have fun! Keep yourself busy.
You need some friends.
Best advice I ever got about chics: don’t chase 'em. Chase your other dreams. Ms. Right will see you chasing your dreams, fall in love with those dreams, and want to come along for the ride. She’ll chase YOU.
Next best advice I ever got about chics: No matter how good looking she is, just remember that somewhere there is another guy who is tired of her crap. (actually, that’s the 3rd best, but I can’t think of a way to put the 2nd best on this forum)
So, maybe they’re not suck disjointed statements after all. Basically, what I’m saying is pull yourself together, get your priorities in order, have a good time, and let things happen in their own good time. Enjoy the ride. You only get to go around once.
I’m gonna buy a kayak. I got a buddy that owns a couple an I like fishing out of’em. You can really sneak up on fish in those things, and they’re great fun going down rivers in
Thats the best therapy for a break up go shopping for fishin stuff,then go use the new stuff.AWWH heck she really DIDN"T like to fish much anyway.
Put on a smile get the yak and get it wet pass the finals and get it movin forward best therapy known to mankind.There will be others the rivers are wide and deep.
Luck with the kayak
I think Kyle said it best: you should probably count your blessings. If she’s willing to stab you in the back like that, then she’s not worth your time!
Chin up. I thought about emailing you and seeing if you wanted to go fish some, but then I realized that you’re down south, and I’m up in Tallahasse. Don’t worry. Consider this an exercise in patience.
I’ll pray for you. Let us know how it’s going. If you ever come up to Tallahasse, let me know and we’ll go hit the flats.
Well, i don’t get as far north as Tallahasse, but i do head up to Bradenton every now an then. Its how i came across the site, searching for fishin info off of Anna Maria Island. Bradenton’s my hometown. Some of the people posting here are from that area. My parents had owned Gabby’s Bar&Grill off of Cortez Rd. They sold it some years ago, its called The Banana Factory now. Sound familiar to anyone by any chance?
Don’t worry. I’m not gonna start drinking. It’s something I don’t plan on doing. My father’s a drunk, the violent kind, and does some other “stuff” on the side. I’m not ashamed to admitt it, it’s shown me what not to do in life. I figure that life is like a poker hand; You’ve just gotta do the best with what you’ve been delt. I do not plan on following his path of rehab and jail.
been there done that headace was a bear. Save your money and buy new gear go fishin.she wasn’t worth it any way cause any good woman knows that if she’s with a fisherman he can always bring home dinner and besides most fishermen/women arn’t home much anyway WE BE FISHIN!!!
get the kayak, you wont regret it
volunteering, I never thought of it, but its a good idea and you can meet more people too
Relationships are nice, but you have to keep seperate lives as well. I’ve dated several girls who want me to concentrate fully on them, and them on me. Its not gonna work like that most the time - you need your friends/hobbies/interests and she needs hers.
Take your mind off of it however you need too, it will pass. I dated a girl once and things weren’t going so well and I was going to end it. Well, she did it first, and it hurt - I don’t know why, I was thinking the same thing, but it still sucked.
Its all part of the life and growing process.
From the sounds of it, you didnt do anything wrong - but it just wasn’t there. it happens. It takes both peoples commitment to make it work.
I’m guessing you’re relatively young-you’ve got plenty of time to bounce back and I’m sure you will. Try to keep you mind off of it and on positive things, involve new people in your life, both male and female, and dont let them slip away when another relationship comes along and know that things work out the way they are suppossed to. it might not always be the way we want it to, but in the end, its right.
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming - “WOW-What a Ride!”
Don’t take life too seriously, you’ll never get out alive.
Everything happens for a reason said the wisest woman I know (my wife). She said it to my son when he lost the gal we thought for sure he would marry. He continued on in school got his masters and is now a film editor in NYC. Oh, he met his soul mate in Grad School and they were married in September. She is a Professor at Pratt and an artist and I have never know two people who have more respect and love for each other. The best thing? At their wedding he told my wife… Mom, you were right!
