We interrupt your regularly scheduled fishing report to bring you this breaking news:
It seems that at least one member of the renegade fly fishing group Team BJAC (Ball Juggling *** Clowns) was spotted on a river in the Pacific Northwest today. Fish and Wildlife officials expressed extreme concern about this. Wildlife officials did say that if you spot one of these clowns use extreme caution and avoid all contact if possible.
We do know that fish were caught, but at this time details are still sketchy. We will keep you informed with further developments as we receive them. We now return you to your regularly scheduled fishing report.
What ever you do, heed the wildlife officials warnings and avoid all contact if you spot one of these clowns. And whatever you do, NEVER, EVER, FEED THEM! Just keep a safe distance. You never want to sneak up on, surprise, or come face to face with one of these ferocious big brown catching clowns standing in the river, I’ve heard their prone to charging and attacking unsuspecting fly fishermen!
Much like when you’re in bear country, whistle or talk loudly while walking the banks of the river in tall thickets. You can usually hear and identify them from some distance away though by their screeching…Kinda sounds something like Owyhee, Owyhee, Owyhee! :lol:
The day was cold and it was calm on the river. All of that was about to change as one member of Team BJAC and an accomplice showed up on this once quiet river. “Previously it was thought that these clowns only resided in the state of California. The fact that at least one has now been spotted in the northwest is of great concern to us” wildlife officials said.
We decided to go undercover to see what all of the fuss was about. Posing as fly fishermen we searched this river until we found one of these clowns holding a fish. It was noted that at the time of this picture he was trying to disguise himself as there is no evidence of any clowning around. From the picture he looks to be pretty happy with this fish.
Evidently not everybody was happy with their presence. When we were there we heard several shotgun rounds go off in close proximity. Then we heard branches behind us breaking and pellets hitting the water (yes unfortunately this really happened. I am not joking around. Seriously know your fricking backdrop!). One of the clowns yelled angrily and no more shots were heard. One clown was then heard saying in a joking fashion “I wonder if I should return fire”.
We interviewed several fly fishermen to see what they had to say about these clowns. “We don?t like them here” one fisherman who wished to remain unidentified said. “They dispel the myth that we are stuffy snobs and we just don’t like that”. “Plus they don’t dress like true fly fishermen” another person said. Another fisherman said “They fish with those damn toy rods”. “Seriously who the heck fishes rods that are under a 3WT”? “Anybody knows you need to fish at least a 5WT for trout”.
We will bring you more on this story as more information becomes available.
I’m scared of clowns but it’s not their fault…my parents never took me to the circus and the only one I had an encounter with was drunk as a newt and scared the **** out of me. LOL.
Thanks guys I am glad you liked the report. I wanted to do something a little different this time
So to clear some things up. The clown thing was not me losing a bet or anything. It is actually a joke from another site that I am on. I wrote that report (both parts) for that site. Then I decided that I would just post it on the other sites I am a member of. This was partly because I didn’t want two write two versions. It was also because I thought that even if you didn’t get the joke it was funny.
Oh one more thing how come every time I write a report in MS word 2007 and paste it on this site, the site replaces the " and ’ with ? I went back and changed them but I noticed I missed a few.
