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If you spend anytime in the out of doors,
sooner or later you are going to either
witness, or more than likely be the originator
of a stupid move. Be honest. We've all had them
and know what they are. They are those "if
hindsight was 20/20" decisions or actions that
have caused us some embarrassment, or a "man am
I lucky" type of encounter.
Most of the times stupid moves are what they are;
stupid! Like driving all the way to your favorite
fishing spot and after arriving realize you left
your reel on the table at home. Or you forgot to
put your waders in the trunk and it's too cold to
wet wade. Or realizing after arriving at your
destination, all your accessories, nippers,
tippet material and such are still on your
lanyard and your lanyard is in a pocket in
your float tube and you're not tubing today.
Sometimes stupid moves can be costly. Such as,
driving off after your done fishing, not knowing
you left one of your fly boxes on the roof of
the car. Or, leaving your fly rod strung and
closing the door breaking off the tip.
Except for bruising one's pride or ego or
creating an unexpected cash flow problem, they
do very little in the way of bodily harm. But
on those rare occasions stupid moves can transform
themselves very quickly into a heart stopping or,
life threatening experience. Take for example
someone forgetting to anchor their kayak while
fishing for stripers and all of a sudden the
tide carries that kayak across the inlet and
you have to swim after it. Only problem is that
you left your PFD in the kayak and it's a long
swim. But you decide to swim after it anyway.
However, just as you get about two thirds of
the way, you begin to have serious doubts as
to whether or not you'll make it. And your
life starts passing before you. Stupid move.
I remember recently watching on one of those TV
news magazine shows, the story of a young man who,
although an experienced hiker and mountain climber,
went hiking into a remote part of Utah. While
hiking an 800 pound boulder fell on his right
hand and wrist pinning him to a narrow canyon
wall. Six days later and after amputating his
right arm, he barley made it out of that canyon
alive. Unfortunately he did not let anyone know
where he was going or how long he intended to be
gone. Stupid move.
My first stupid move I can recall was when I was
around twelve years old. It was my first over night
camping trip as a Boy Scout. My father had given
me a hatchet to take along to cut firewood with.
My mother was against me taking it, afraid I would
lose it. My parents were married in the early 30's
and they found this hatchet in the very first house
they lived in. So I guess there was some sentimental
value with it. Well her premonition came true. I
left it out in the woods and try as I may never
could find it. In all honesty, I don't know if
it was because my mother knew I would lose it or
a stupid move that caused that hatchet and me to
become separated.
The second stupid move I remember, although I'm
sure there may have been one or two others I have
forgotten about, from my youth happened when I
was around seventeen years old. We lived in
upstate New York and were subject to some brutal
winters in both the amount of snow and low
temperatures. It was January and I had been
hunting rabbits in an area north of town. It
was actually on a section of land that belonged
to my older brother. Through Bob's property ran
a small insignificant stream or creek. Insignificant
in that it held no fish. Something I determined
after spending countless hours through keen
observation and returning empty handed each time
I fished it.
However, this stream was always flowing and
beavers even used a portion of it to dam up
and create a nice little pond for themselves.
During the winter, the narrower sections would
freeze over, but walking across its widest part
was always a delicate affair and risky at best.
In fact a prudent person would walk back up to
the narrowest part and cross there. But what
do you expect from a teenager? Especially a
teenage boy who likened himself to his hero,
Hawkeye from The Last of the Mohicans!
The day had been sunny and for January
unseasonably warm. The temperature was somewhere
in the low to mid-thirties. Warm enough to feel
good on your back and prompting one to unzip the
red and black Mackinaw wool hunting coat, but
cold enough for long johns and wool socks. I
had taken a few rabbits and was walking back
to my dad's car when I came upon the stream.
Snow covered and appearing quite safe I started
walking across until almost halfway when I heard
the crack and I went through the ice. Not being
very deep, I went in up to my waist. Then my feet
slipped and now I am soaked from my neck down.
I managed to get out but faced a long wet walk
to the car. It was late afternoon and the sun
along with the temperature began to drop.
By the time I reached my dad's car my clothes
and most of my body was frozen. Through stiff
cold clothing I managed to find the car keys
and shivering wildly unlocked the door climbed
in and started the engine. I don't know how
long I sat there but it was well after dark
before I got home. Unfortunately my thawing
clothes left a big wet spot on the driver's
seat and refroze over night. That next morning
when my dad sat in the car to drive us to
church he uttered a string of phrases in
French. Words that if translated would not
be thought of as appropriate language before
entering the House of the Lord.
I've had my share of stupid moves as an adult
as well. While I've never left a reel home, I
have arrived without my vest or tackle pack.
Or of all things, tipping over a canoe, while
playing a ferocious bluegill. To this day, I
still don't know how I managed that one. Oh,
and I've tied up a bunch of Woolly Buggers,
some weighted some not and not being able to
distinguish which is which. I now tie a different
head on the weighted ones, using red thread.
Once on an early summer day some years back,
when we were living outside of Austin, Texas,
and I had gotten up early to go fish a nearby
reservoir. From previous outings, I knew it
would be a fine morning for using top water
bugs until the sun came up and then subsurface
once it was high. In a hurry to launch my boat,
I forgot to tie the bow rope, as was my custom,
to the bumper of my pickup. After launching my
boat, I got out of my truck only to notice my
boat floating ever so slowing away. And yes,
my PFD was in the boat as well. Having no change
of clothes in the boat and being still somewhat
dark, I decided to strip down and go for a swim.
Well I retrieved my boat, tied it to the dock
and walked back to my truck to get dressed. As
luck would have it, just as I was putting my
clothes back on another vehicle drove up. A
few minutes sooner and those two young children
in the car would have been exposed to not only
the sun rising but a moon in the parking lot as
well.
I could go on and on relating a host of other
stupid moves that have occurred. But why expose
myself to more embarrassment? Like I said, we've
all done them. To continue on would only cast
serious doubts as to whether or not I should be
left alone in the out of doors, or whether I
should not be allowed to venture out without
adult supervision.
So the next time you experience a stupid move,
remember you're not alone. In the words of Red
Green: "I'm pulling for ya! We're all in this
together." ~ Angler Dave
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