I'm sure you've all heard many expressions relating to the title of this
article. Little things like "Dr., heal thy self!" and "Eating a little crow",
or "Do as I say, not as I do". Well, it's my turn for a few major changes,
again!
Seems like the recent Multiple Sclerosis attack wasn't quite nasty enough, I
had to go and do something really stupid to top it off. Like, falling out of
the back of a pick-up truck while helping unload river rock for a landscaping
project. Hey folks, I did it right! When I knew I was going to fall, I went
into the "tuck and roll position" so that when I hit I could just roll my fat
little body on the ground to absorb the impact, just like I've been taught to
do by the military. Of course that's when the Multiple Sclerosis really likes
to jump in and help out. Like, I forgot that I still had a shovel in my
hands!
Long story short, the flat part of the shovel hit my head (No harm
done there except for a lump the size of an orange, I'm a hard-headed kraut)
and when I hit (and rolled) the handle was against my chest, resulting in
(we'll stay conservative and call it 180 plus pounds) of my weight pressing against
it and breaking a couple of ribs. No lung damage, lots of bruises, a headache
for a few days (at least I don't have much hair to comb, because that really
hurts!)
Anyway, as I hobbled down to the river a few days back, fly rod in hand (my
wife taunting me with words of encouragement - like, "You're the most obstinate
person I've ever known! You're still on heavy medications for the Multiple
Sclerosis attack. You've got two cracked or broken ribs and are on pain
medication for that. You've got more bruises than a street fighter and a lump
on the side of your head so big your hat won't fit and YOU WANT TO FLY
FISH?" )
Okay, so being the type of guy I am, not unlike a lot of men, I took
that as a challenge! After all, the crappies and gillies are spawning, not to
mention the bass are in the shallows raiding their nests, and opportunity that
only comes once a year! Well on the first cast attempt and old saying from
Bill Cosby came to mind immediately: "And the PAIN was tremendous!" I
couldn't very well scream, after all, that wouldn't be "macho", but I have to
say, the inside of my lip really took a beating, not to mention the bugs in my
eyes caused a little moisture! Time for some major changes if I was going to
fly fish!
I needed to be able to get my popper or streamer about 35 feet into the
shallows to where the fish were. There was no current to speak of so floating
anything in with the current wasn't an option. I found a little shade under a
tree, took off my vest, sat down (yes, my wife took immediate notice and
yelled something to the effect of "I told you that you couldn't do it!")
Hmmm, another challenge! I started by cutting off the light-weight tippet material
I usually used for small pan fish. Next I removed the light, 2 pound leader.
I replaced the leader with some 8 pound monofilament line, no tippet. Then I
tied on a small, "mini marshmallow" popper onto the mono. Then I headed back
over to the river bank.
This time I knew the old, over-the-head single cast (or double, for that matter) was
out of the question (my lip still hurt from the first attempt!) I kind of
laid out about 30 feet of my line on the lawn behind me. Then, holding my rod
about level to my waist, I carefully swung my body around, bending at the
knees similar to a golfer, not the torso, and kind of "catapulted" the line
into the middle of the shallows. I knew if the line got caught up in the
grass or a weed I was taking a chance at busting the rod, but there was the
challenge at stake here!
The technique seemed to work fairly well, and after a few more attempts and
modifications I was able to get the popper out where I wanted it. It
wasn't the most accurate casting, I'll admit that, but it worked. The weight
of the line compensated for the back cast. After a few more casts I met the
next challenge. I had a fish on! It felt like a decent sized one, but with
the pulling on my arms and the pain it was producing in the chest, who could
tell? What to do now? OK, this is why I put the heavier mono on. I simply
held onto the line, backed up, literally dragging the fish onto shore. It
wasn't pretty, but it was effective! And I wasn't in the catch and release
mode anyway, I wanted to taste a few crappies for supper! (Don't bother
writing me and trying to shame me into all the C/R stuff, I eat a lot of the
fish I catch and I have no intention of stopping. I do, however stay
conservative on my limits, only keeping what we are going to eat, and
releasing obviously egg-filled females to spawn.) I put the 9 inch crappie on
a stringer, hung it off the side of the dock and headed back for a few more.
I'd caught a half dozen when I noticed my wife walking down the lawn towards
me. She'd seen the last one I'd caught and I guess curiosity had gotten the
best of her. She asked how many I'd caught, I told her to take a look at the
stringer. She looked, smiled, and said, "well I guess sometimes being bull
headed does pay off!"
I looked at her and said, "Bull headed, ME? I thought
it was innovation not bull headedness!"
She just smiled again and said, "So, I suppose you want me to heat up the
big black skillet to fry these in, right?"
I, of course, said yes. She looked at me with one of those impish
grins and said, "So do you think you can "innovate" a way to get that 10
pound, cast iron monster off the hook on the wall for me so I can use it?"
I thought for a moment then smiled back and said, "Sure, I'll just catch a few
extras, invite the neighbor over for fish dinner, and ask him to get the pan
down for me so YOU can fry the fish!"
She blushed a little bit, turned and started walking back up to the house,
then stopped, turned and said, "I guess I better be careful of the tasks I
challenge you with for a while, you seem to be able to come up with a
resolution for almost anything! But what do you think about later on
tonight?"
Like I said, I love a good challenge!
~ Randy Fratzke
|
