That's just the kind of guy Jack is.

Hey Jack. My birthday is coming up and I want to get back into bird hunting and sporting clays. Please ship (at your expense) a Benelli Cordoba (12 Gauge, 28", 3") so that I get off on the right foot. That old Ithaca Model 37 Featherlight I have just don't cut it anymore. You already have my address, so could you get it out today and ship it FedEx Overnight so I can go out with it on Saturday? You're the best, Jack. Oh, and a case of trap/skeet loads would be nice too.

Your Friend,

Joseph the Intolerable