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Type: Posts; User: Uncle Jesse

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  1. Replies
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    Son: "Dad, will you do my math homework for me...

    Son: "Dad, will you do my math homework for me tonight?"Dad: "No son, it wouldn?t be right."Son: "Well, just do your best."
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    School Principal: Johnny, why is your math...

    School Principal: Johnny, why is your math teacher crying? ...
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    A man and his wife check into a hotelThe husband...

    A man and his wife check into a hotelThe husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest.She lies down on the bed when,...
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    The elderly Chief noticed a new seaman one day...

    The elderly Chief noticed a new seaman one day and barked at him.?Get over here! ?What is your name?? was the first thing the Chief asked the new guy.?Paul.? The new guy replied.The elderly Chief...
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    The only thing that will kill the thread is...

    The only thing that will kill the thread is apathy and neglect
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    Jim you have become a mad scientist of fly tying....

    Jim you have become a mad scientist of fly tying. That's a good looking fly to tempt the many species you now have to go after. I'm a little envious.
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    "This is a classic quote from grade school...

    "This is a classic quote from grade school examination paper.........One of the causes of the Revolutionary War was the English put tacks in their tea. Also, the colonists would send their parcels...
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    So sad to hear that Jack has passed. Met him and...

    So sad to hear that Jack has passed. Met him and Warren up in Tullahoma several years ago and have been longing to go back ever since. A couple of great guys to fish with and just spend time with....
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    "You know why a politician is like a banana?" ...

    "You know why a politician is like a banana?" "He comes in and first he is green, then he turns yellow and then he's rotten." ...
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    I'll bet the bowfin and gar were a lot of fun. ...

    I'll bet the bowfin and gar were a lot of fun. Further south you will find the bowfin referred to as grindle and choupique.
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    We all get heavier as we get older, because...

    We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
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    Supposedly a true story: A new, young MD doing...

    Supposedly a true story: A new, young MD doing his residency in OB was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams. To cover his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling...
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    A classic story, I'm sharing it on Facebook, 3...

    A classic story, I'm sharing it on Facebook, 3 paragraphs
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    Thanks for the good thoughts guys. My wife and I...

    Thanks for the good thoughts guys. My wife and I celebrated our 56th anniversary 5 days ago and had a small celebration with our daughter, son in law and 4 year old grand daughter to night. It's my...
  15. Thread: Quote

    by Uncle Jesse
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    There few things as good as a home grown tomato. ...

    There few things as good as a home grown tomato. There?s a old country song that goes ?there?s two things money can?t buy, real true love and home grown tomatoes?
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    Refresher course on Laws they don't teach in...

    Refresher course on Laws they don't teach in Physics class . . .

    Law of Mechanical Repair- After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

    Law of Gravity - Any tool,...
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    I enlarged the font because I figured only old...

    I enlarged the font because I figured only old guys like me would understand the following.

    Lost Words from our Childhood

    Mergatroyd! Do you remember that word? Would you believe the...
  18. Thread: last trip?

    by Uncle Jesse
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    6,805

    It's 20 mph considered a gentle breeze in Iowa? ...

    It's 20 mph considered a gentle breeze in Iowa? Congrats on the catches between getting roped into going back to work and my granddaughter fishing has become something I used to do. But, the...
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    I just remembered there are insert that attached...

    I just remembered there are insert that attached to inside of non-prescription glasses that make your sunglasses into bifocals.
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    Consider yourself blessed you only need help...

    Consider yourself blessed you only need help seeing when you are doing tiny work like tying on flies. I have had a pair of glasses sitting on my nose for about 55 years now, and I consider myself...
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    My Daddy Sleeps Naked “Late again!” the...

    My Daddy Sleeps Naked

    “Late again!” the third-grade teacher sternly said to little Ranger.

    “It ain’t my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this ‘un on my Daddy.

    The reason I’m...
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    Hobby Lobby has such a wide variety of materials...

    Hobby Lobby has such a wide variety of materials I have thought for a long time they should focus on their fly tying customers a little more. At times you can find some interesting pheasant tails,...
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    A man goes to the supermarket and notices an...

    A man goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.

    She says hello. He's rather taken back because he can't place where he knows her from.

    So he says, "Do you know...
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    Happy Birthday Joe, I hope it's been a good one.

    Happy Birthday Joe, I hope it's been a good one.
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    Scott, bream as we call them down South are the...

    Scott, bream as we call them down South are the teenage boys of the fish world. They see something in the water and think "I can get that in my mouth." My problem is getting out on the water.
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