Life is Tough
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you
could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked
for a half dozen nuggets.
Sent in by Arthur Williams
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at
"You don't?" I replied.
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
The story above doesn't amaze me because of
what happened a couple of months ago. I was
checking out at the local Foodland with
just a few items and the lady behind me put
her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up
one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash register
and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked
up the "Divider" looking it all over for the bar code
so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said
to me "Do you know how much this is?"
And I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think
I'll buy that today."
She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue as to what had just happened...
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her
floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When
inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was
shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit
card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside
her car. Do you need some help? I asked. She replied,
"I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote
door UN-locker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you
think they (pointing to a distant convenient store) would
have a battery to fit this?"
Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing
it and the car keys to me.
As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check
about the batteries. It's a long walk."
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift.
One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said,
"I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her.
With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of
paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank"
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large
motor home was towed into the garage. The front of
the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the
whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister."
I asked the manager what had happened. He told me
that the driver had set the "cruise control" and
then went in the back to make a sandwich.
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a
suspect by placing a metal colander on his head
and connecting it with wires to a photocopy
machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier,
and the police pressed the copy button each time
they thought the suspect wasn't telling the
truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect
"Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid."
Lighter Side Archive