I arrived home with a new piece of equipment, and had
covertly maneuvered into "my room" with it. Not just
any piece of equipment. No, this was the One. The One
I had dreamt about, drooled over, saved for, and even
skimmed a little off the budget for. All the while,
keeping my lustful ways hidden from my spouse. Now
finally, here I was alone in "my room" with the One,
when my spouse walked in. Had I just tucked away this
One with all of my other Ones, my spouse would have been
none-the-wiser. But how could I finally have it, and
not hold it? Even, I dare say, caress it? Certainly
not something my non-fishing spouse would ever understand.
So there I stood with the One in my hand, and was asked
the one question I knew was coming: "Where did you get that?"
Having been faced with this same dilemma on more than One
occasion, I knew my options, and they were precisely one
more than one. Time stands still in these moments of
clarity, but my mind began to work with amazing speed.
While wondering why I didn't already have a logical
explanation for the One's acquisition, I quickly
considered one possible explanation after another.
The consequences of each were weighed, and judgments
were made regarding which friends would back me up if
they were implicated in any scenario I might convey.
But I had also been taught that, "Honesty is the best
policy," and I wasn't quite cornered yet. One word
held the key to my fate, and I offered it in a feeble
attempt to buy some more time and redirect if possible.
"What?" I asked as innocently as I could, and then tried
to act as if I had nothing new in my hand.
People who don't fish aren't necessarily dumb or unable
to see. I know this because my spouse doesn't fish, is
as smart as they come, and sees things way too clearly in
situations like this one. So all I got in response was a
look that saw right through me, and exactly one word back,
I'm not one to preach, but I think it should be pointed
out that telling a falsehood is never really a good thing.
Consider even, that by being one that fishes, I have by
default, a certain reputation. You know the One. So for
the common good of all who fish, and in an attempt to not
perpetuate, validate, or in any other way contribute to
this reputation, especially among Fly Fishers with a
non-fishing spouse, I did the honorable thing. I begged
for forgiveness One more time.
Now let me tell you about the One that got away. ~ David Shumway