bluehackle,

I hear you. When I first started out flytying I found it difficult trying to figure out the same things you are going through now. Another great source is the The Fly Tier's Benchside Reference To Techniques and Dressing Styles by Ted Leeson and Jim Schollmeyer published by Amato Books. It is a bit pricey, but well worth the $. It is a book focused on techniques and not a how-to on tying a particular pattern.