I'm not so sure about the "spouse friendly" part, but years ago I was an authorized (by the Department of Agriculture) importer of feathers in Pennsylvania. I think there were only 2 of us in Pennsylvania at the time.

As soon as the feathers cleared customs, and were shipped to me, I was required to quarantine them in a locked building that had to be physically separate from other inhabited buildings, and as I recall it had to be at least 50' distant.

Then the feathers had to be immediately placed in a diluted solution of formaldehyde, and soaked for a specified minimum length of time - I can't remember the specific dilution, or time for the soaking, but this is probably available somewhere on the internet. I also had periodic inspections from a veterinarian of the department of agriculture to make sure I followed the correct procedures. It was a pretty simple process, and and the feathers only needed to be air dried after soaking.

I believe formaldehyde may still be used today as a commercial disinfectant. However, with the advent of OSHA, etc. I suspect the procedures are more stringent today.