saddened

[nighthawk]

Today about 1/2 hour ago my dad passed away. Although this is a sad occasion with much griefing for the living it saddens me at people. My mom is good with it. She will miss him but she had 47 good years with him. Maybe she has a better pespective then I do. My whole family was "Idon't care attitude" while he lay in his bed at home dying. Although he was my step dad I respected and loved the man as if he were my own dad. Iguess what saddens me is that my whole family did not talk bad about him as he lay in his death bed they did not talk good about him either. It was as if he was not there. I know everyone griefs in their own fashion and respect that but not to respect the man as he passes saddens me. I was his stepson and respected him more then his own children. That saddens me. The hospice nurse that stayed with us through this was very none jalaunt and treated this as oh well this hapens everyday in my life get used to it. I don't know maybe I am stupid or old and emotional who knows but this makes me very sad not just at the passing of a very good man but at the actions of the people who supposedly loved him. I just don't get it. Thanks for listening I needed to get this out somewhere.

Bob,
My heart is breaking for you. You are such a wonderful guy. You made his life special because you realized that it takes love to make a dad. Genetics only accounts for a "Father". Dad is all about loving his children and he was indeed your dad!

Lord Jesus Christ, my savior, I humbly ask thee to wrap your loving arms around Bob. Give him peace of mind and heart in the knowledge that his dad now dwells in the house of the greatest dad of all, our Heavenly Father. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

[Lew]

I come from a large family. At the time of my father's death, everyone gathered round, with the hope that each could do something in the way of support to my parents, and each other. Even with all the family around, I was struck by how lonely a process it is for the one who's preparing to depart. I can't help but think that as our own time comes, when we have to "walk that lonesome highway", and that "we have to walk it by ourself", that it would be a great comfort to have caring loved ones around us. You've filled that role very well, Harley, even if his children have not. They may not learn of that empathy until their own time comes. My condolences.

[harleybob87]

Thank you everyone for your heartfelt prayers and condolances.

[flyfishfairwx]

hb87

Your families reaction is normal and so is yours, to an abnormal event, people are not connected to death and the dying in the way past generations were, they do not see it on the farms they see it on TV and that is just acting, or it happens "over there"

It was at one time very normal to have a relative dying in the family home, and not in a "retirement home or acute or extended care home".

So their reaction is normal, Plse do not hold it against them, or harden your heart to them. Hold on to the good memories and they will help you heal.

Your fathers care worker has found a way to toughen her exterior so that these losses do not hurt as much, as she see much more then a "normal" person or family member would..

I come by this knowledge or view honestly, I worked Ambulance for 8 yrs and 911 for 8yrs also.

My prayers and thoughts are with you, and yours..

[51BC]

Bob, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my dad 8 1/2 years ago. I still miss him.

[aged_sage]

May God be with you and give you the strength and courage to get through this very difficult time. People grievfe in many different ways and for varying lengths of time. If you have a Grief Support Group at a local church, I encourage you to take advantage of it. It will soon be 35 years since I lost my Dad, and I still miss him. Same goes for my Mom and my only sister, but I lost them much more recently.

Aged_sage

[aged_sage]

Bob:

I am very sorry to learn of your loss. May God give you the strength to get through tis very troubling time. I would encourage you to take advantage of a local Grief Support Group, if you have one. They help.

[empeekay]

Bob - I can empathise. I lost my dad this past summer. November mom & dad would have been married 60 yrs. Although he suffered with Alzheimers for nearly ten years, then.... realization of the loss was no less painful. I can only pray for comfort and healing on your behalf. You/we are not alone...as the road is tread upon. You're not alone
Mike K.

[Gigmaster]

My prayers are with you.

[John R]

Man, Bob, I'm sorry for your loss. Remember all the good times with your Dad! You and your family will be in our prayers!

John & Vicki