We need some laughs here !!!

[Uncle Jesse]

The old lady handed her bank card to a bank teller and said, “I would like to withdraw $10

The teller told her, “For withdrawals less than $100 please use the ATM.”

The old lady wanted to know why ...

The teller returned her bank card and irritably told her, “These are the rules. Please leave if there is no other matter. There is a line of customers behind you.”

The old lady remained silent for a few seconds, then handed the card back to the teller and said, “Please help me withdraw all the money I have.”

The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down and respectfully told her, you have $300,000 in your account and the bank doesn't have that much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come again tomorrow?

The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately.
The teller told her any amount up to $3000

"Well, please let me have $3000 now", she told the teller

He then counted out the money and handed it very friendly and respectfully to her

The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2990 back into her account.

The moral of this tale .......Don't be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning the skills.

[Uncle Jesse]

COVID 19 Self-TEST - This is the best available so far.A new and easy test for Covid-19 is doing the rounds.

It's simple, quick and either positive or negative.

Take a glass and pour a decent shot of your favorite whisky into it; then see if you can smell it. If you can, then you are halfway there.

Then drink it down. If you can taste it, then it is reasonable to assume you are currently free of the virus because the loss of the senses of smell and taste is a common symptom.

I tested myself nine times last night and was virus-free every time, thank goodness.

I will have to test myself again today because I developed a throbbing headache this morning (which can also be one of the symptoms).

I'll report my results later...

[sagefisher]

The same test works well with tequila.

Larry ---sagefisher---

[Byron Zuehlsdorff]

LOVE IT!!! put my whiskey in my tea or coffee

[Byron Zuehlsdorff]

whiskey in my tea or coffee

[Uncle Jesse]

I copied this BC strip onto Facebook, EdD reminded me "[COLOR=var(--primary-text)]Keepeth Thy Backcast Uppeth' - J. Castwell[/COLOR]

• [COLOR=var(--secondary-text)]Like[/COLOR]
  
  
  
  
  

[ducksterman]

2 Irish Women.....
 Two women were sitting next to each other at a bar. After a while, one
looks at the other and says, 'I can't help but think, from listening to you,
that you're from Ireland.'

The other woman responds proudly, 'Yes, I sure am!'

The first one says, 'So am I! And where about in Ireland are ya from?'

The other woman answers, 'I'm from Dublin, I am.'

The first one responds, 'So, am I!! And what street did you live on in
Dublin ?'

The other woman says, 'A lovely little area. It was in the west end. I
lived on Warbury Street in the old central part of town.'

The first one says, 'Faith and begorrah it's a small world. So did I! So
did I! And what school did ya go to?'

The other woman answers, 'Well now, I went to Holy Heart of Mary, of
course.'

The first one gets really excited and says, 'And so did I! Tell me, what
year did you graduate?'

The other woman answers, 'Well, now, let's see. I graduated in 1964.'

The first woman exclaims, 'The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I
can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same pub tonight! Can
you believe it? I graduated from Holy Heart of Mary in 1964 me self!'

About this time, Michael walks into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer.
Brian, the bartender, walks over to Michael shaking his head and mutters,
'It's going to be a long night tonight.'

Michael asks, 'Why do you say that, Brian?'


Brian answers, 'The Murphy twins are drunk again!'

[Marco]

Hey UJ,
Apparently after Mr. Hart's passing in 07' the "Ceators Syn." didn't have anyone familiar with fly fishing terminology. Backhand = > Backcast.
But, credit................they tried.
In any case, waaayyyy out on the limb for "them".

[Uncle Jesse]

An elderly couple were out for a Sunday afternoon drive. Along the way, they saw a sign that said, "TRY EXLAX AND FEEL YEARS YOUNGER!"

So they did. A little later, the wife asked her husband,"Feel any younger yet?" To which he replied, "No, let's try another piece."

This went on until the bar of the chocolate flavored candy was gone. As they traveled, the wife again asked, "How about now, feel any younger?"

The husband squirmed a bit, then said, "I don't feel any younger, but I just did a childish thing."

[Uncle Jesse]