And in that same vein,
CURTAIN RODS --- PRICELESS
> On the first day, she sadly packed her belongings into boxes, crates
> and suitcases.
> On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things..
> On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
> dining-room table, by candle-light; she put on some soft background
> music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar,and a bottle of
> When she'd finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a
> few half-eaten shrimps dipped in caviar into the hollow centre of the
> curtain rods.
> She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
> On the fourth day, the husband came back with his new girlfriend, and
> at first all was bliss.
> Then, slowly, the house began to smell.
> They tried everything; cleaning, mopping, and airing-out the place.
> Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned.
> Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to
> set off gas canisters, during which time the two had to move out for a
> few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool
> carpeting. Nothing worked!
> People stopped coming over to visit.
> Repairmen refused to work in the house.
> The maid quit.
> Finally, they couldn't take the stench any longer, and decided they had
> to move, but a month later - even though they'd cut their price in half
> - they couldn't find a buyer for such a stinky house.
> Word got out, and eventually even the local realtors refused to return
> their calls.
> Finally, unable to wait any longer for a purchaser, they had to borrow a
> huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
> Then the ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told
> her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that
> she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her
> divorce settlement in exchange for having the house.
> Knowing she could have no idea how bad the smell really was, he agreed
> on a price that was only 1/10 th of what the house had been worth ...
> but only if she would sign the papers that very day.
> She agreed, and within two hours his lawyers delivered the completed
> A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched
> the moving company pack everything to take to their new home ....
> .. and to spite the ex-wife, they even took the the curtain rods!
> I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?
THAT being said, I'd rather be in Wyoming.