Eric, this may be not the "actual cause", but at the end of your message YOU DID mention something about "Talking to Mike"!? Which I'm guessing, is aka; "Vise Thief", "Ohiotuber" and/or "Fanny Fudge"?
If so, don't despair my friend. I've often had odd rashes, ticks and twitches to the eyes, even stuttering, after a phone conversation with the above mentioned person.
I'm really sorry that you're so uncomfortable, (seriously).
As to "cures", I'd go with the Oatmeal Bath idea. It's an old recipe for hives and rashes and as stated by others; "It does work"!