Norm Albiston, who teaches fly fishing at the University of Utah at Provo, says there are four stages to a fisherman?s development:

Please just let me catch a fish.
I want to catch a lot of fish.
Please let me catch a big fish.
I only want to catch big fish.

I?ve just caught my first fish so I?m firmly in the first group. But this list of stages doesn?t take into account all the previous stages such as:

Please let me cast without catching my fly in the trees.
Please let me get that darn tippet through the eye of the Gosh Darn hook.
Please let me cast without splashing my line on the water and spooking the fish.

The thing is, just because you?ve achieved one level it doesn?t mean that you?ve left the previous level. I?ve finally caught my first fish on a fly line, but it doesn?t mean that I?ve left the past behind.

On Friday my wife and I went out to our favorite fishing spot. She was casting from the very spot were I caught my fish and I went downstream to cast upstream to the very few rising trout that we could see. Although I?ve had days where I was casting really well this time I was throwing air knots, I was splashing the water, and touching the bushes behind me. I certainly wasn?t catching fish.

I noticed a fish splashing across the river and just a bit downstream from me. I turned to cast towards it. It was quite a way away so I needed to make a big cast. Somehow the rhythm of my cast was right on and combined with the wind that was blowing in just the right direction I was ready to make that big cast to a spot just upstream from the trout. On my last back cast, just before my final cast, my line seizes up. I?m caught in the tree behind me.

Luckily, I?ve read about people breaking rods trying to release a caught fly. So instead of pulling with my rod I pointed the rod directly at the fly and pulled on the line with my left hand. The fly came down without too much stress. With my fly back in hand I repositioned myself so my back cast would go into an empty area between two trees. After several cast to just the right spot I still was getting no reaction from the fish. Feeling a bit frustrated I decide to go upstream to the hole where I?ve hooked a big trout twice (but couldn?t land him).

I waded into my special spot and roll cast to the spot where I know my big trout would hang out. After a few cast he started to rise. Just like the last time I hooked him I had to present the fly a dozen times or so and he started getting more interested. I?m in a great position to present the fly properly and I can just feel him getting closer and closer.

I present him with the fly and let it drift down to his feeding spot when he jumps. But when he jumps it?s not just at the fly, he jumps over my fly line like a high jumper. When he jumps he?s turned 90 degrees to me so I can see him perfectly.

First of all, he?s huge. At least for a trout in this stream. To my stunned eyes he looks to be about the length and the girth of my forearm. But more than that, he?s golden yellow. I?ve heard of golden trout in the high Sierras, but down here in the foothills we?re too low for them. I may be completely mis-remembering the event but for that split second when he was in the air he looked golden.

I want him. I?m going to catch him. He?s my fish and he can?t run away.

I keep casting to him and after a few more cast he hits my fly hard. I set the hook and instantly it comes back slack. I reel in the line and check my fly and it?s gone. But more importantly the line broke right at the knot. I can still see the curled up tippet where the knot use to be.

My mind goes back to that snag in the tree. What I should have done is to cut the fly off and re-tie it as soon as I retrieved it. What I did was to fish with a damaged knot that was ready to break at any moment. If I was lucky I would have hooked one of the small rainbows first and let them break off my knot. If I was smart I would have re-tied the knot.

So the big golden trout has been hooked 3 times, he?s broken off 2 flies and I?ve actually fought him twice. I think my next step in the journey is to catch this specific fish. That?s not obsessive is it?